I am an open book. So, it will come as no surprise to the people who know me that this is the way I chose to journal my weight loss process. In December 2013 I was in the emergency room 4 times due to uncontrolled asthma. I had high blood pressure and felt like a rough 60-year-old. I’m 41 and my personality is that of a young 30-year-old. So I went to my primary care doctor to have an honest conversation about my weight. For years he simply said to me “you need to lose weight.” Talk about stating the obvious. Yup, I am well aware I am fat. Not fluffy, not chunky, not a “big girl”, or a “plumpkin”, but fat. I have never been thin. I was at my smallest what we in the black community call thick — small waist, but curvy.
Over the years life happens. I picked up some weight when my daughter was born. I picked up some more over the subsequent years until one day about 4 years ago I didn’t recognize the woman staring back at me. I felt like shit. Everything ached and nothing was comfortable. I knew then that I needed to do something. It took four years of trying different things including joining a gym (net weight loss 10 pounds) and eating healthier. But the truth of the matter is my weight was prohibitive. That is not an excuse. I had allowed my weight to make my asthma so bad that simply walking on a treadmill for a half hour meant I may need an ER afterwards. That’s a hard thing to admit. So, more than my physical appearance (I’ve been blessed with good self-esteem no matter my size) I was afraid for my life.
So, in January 2014 I told my doctor that I was sick and tired of him throwing a pill at all of my issues and I fearful I wouldn’t make it to 60 much less the 90 I’m trying for. I told him quite plainly to quit medicating my fat and help me get rid of it. He is not a fan of weight loss surgery, but he conceded that he’d either give me the referral or loss me as a patient because I was done.
In the last six months I have been through a battery of tests that make feel like I had been rode hard and hung up wet. I have seen every –oligist you can imagine and a psychiatrist. I have been poked, prodded, scoped, and pricked more than I want to think about. But most importantly I have been educated. I have been educated about why diets have never worked long-term for me. I have been educated about why exercise is not only important, but only one piece of my puzzle. And I have been forced to look at my health without blinders on and learn what I need to do so that I can be healthy.
I will have Roux en Y Gastric Bypass surgery on July 22, 2014. I am inviting you to follow my journey.