Random Free Association, Cognitive Observations, & Emotive Diatribes all working together in harmony…

I Don’t Get It

An ex has decided to comment on my blog. After a few posts of trying to ignore him it nagged at me that he decided to ignore his home training and not be a gentleman by leaving me alone. So, I emailed him saying that if he needed to watch my life he should watch silently from the shadows. I told him I didn’t want to know he was lurking and I didn’t want to know what he thought about what I write. He e-mailed me back and told me he “needs the stimulation” so apparently I’m supposed to care. Apparently, it is supposed to matter to me.

When he left me and decided to marry the other woman he didn’t take into consideration that he was going to miss anything about me. Maybe, he thought I’d stay. I put up with a lot while we were together. Maybe he thought after some space and time I’d forget all the heartache and headache I experienced throughout out eight year “relationship”. Who knows — like Joni Mitchell said “Don’t it always seem to go that you don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone”

Don’t get me wrong I forgave him for his part in broken heart, and over the years I have owned my own failings that allowed me to stay as long as I did. However, in the last post I wrote he made the comment that he agreed with Curious that maybe I needed someone to do for me. Really?

Let’s just say I do need someone to do something for me. Maybe I have neglected myself and could use a little pampering. The question becomes was he going to do it and would his wife appreciate him being so attentive to me? Ummmm… Imma go out on a limb and say that is a definitive no. He wasn’t very attentive the whole 8 years we were together. Everything was about him all the time and when it wasn’t about him it was about what he could change about me. I’m trying to figure out if I was so imperfect when we were together why would you care what I have to say now?

I considered shutting my blog down because of this man, but the truth be told since we broke up I have changed my number and moved. That should be enough. I don’t think I should punish myself by closing the place I vent my thoughts just because he refuses to be a gentleman. I just don’t understand how a person can be so self centered that after everything that happened between us he feels he has the right to force his way into any part of my life? I don’t get that? I don’t understand why I should care his home life is so boring he misses what I have to say. I am of the opinion that it wasn’t worth much to him since he married someone else. We all have decisions we have to live with.

Rick, I think its time you stop this nonsense. Just go away. This is my last request. Don’t make this get ugly… I haven’t changed that much.


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Comments on: "I Don’t Get It" (3)

  1. You’re better than me because he would have never had access to my blog. There are some things I share and some things I don’t and my blog where I have the liberty of speaking my mind however I want to would not be domain for him to lurk. I’m all for bygones, but some people simply don’t respect that or your privacy.

    I have someone whom I used to date that thinks that he can woo me back in with sweet words of his missing me etc, but it ain’t gonna happen. I stopped seeing him for a reason and that reason stands.

    I don’t think you should shut your blog down, but either make it so he can no longer access it or migrate to another server.

    It’s all possible!

  2. Hey, hey, hey, first in the interests of full disclosure and fairness and before I appear on Divorce Court or Cheaters I just wanted to say that I think that were 2 parts to my response. 1 being the someone to do for you bit, but the other which was as equally important was to take stock of what you have and who you are and find the joy in that. At least that’s what I meant to say.

    Anyway, I’m not one to say that the US is the greatest country in the world, in fact I believe no country is but it has one of the greatest freedoms or liberties that any nation has ever had, your right to freedom of speech. So don’t let anybody, the government, the courts, your neighbors and the ex or even you, frighten you from being you and expressing your thoughts and your needs. I know it’s easy for me to say this because I’ve haven’t been to prison but I think the worst prison you could ever find yourself in is the prison of the mind where you have to restrict or censor yourself. Don’t let him put you there.

    • Mz. Moore said:

      You are correct Curious & Blujewel! I could say more, but sometimes right is just right. Thanks!

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