Through My Eyes

Random Free Association, Cognitive Observations and Emotive Diatribes all working together in Harmony

Archive for December, 2007

Bottom Heavy

Posted by Ingrid on 27 December 2007

 

He Lifted Me

by Henry Lee Battles

 

“…To you I lift my offering and set my heart on higher things. For if it had not been for you standing on my side where would I be…”
__________________________~Israel Houghton

In the live version of the song “Still Standing”; Israel discusses how when he was little — he had a toy that, when punched, would bounce back up. It did this because it was weighted on the bottom. He goes on to explain he has a bounce back in his spirit. Life has poured on all it could, the devil has hit him with his best shot and yet he’s still standing. Well I understand fully that sentiment.

At the close of 2007, I have come to terms with several things that have either hurt or baffled me.

In 2006 life happened to me. No big deal it happens to all of us at some point. In 2007 I wrestle not only with Satan and my desire for vengeance and retribution but also with God because there were things I just did not understand. So what did I learn?

I have come to terms with the fact going to church is not what grounds my salvation or makes me a “good” person. I now understand that it is God’s Grace and Mercy that have carried me to this space and time. In 2008 I look forward to earning His Favor.

I learned that I have been called to a higher purpose. My life means something. How I live matters. I have learned that no matter how others may perceive my so-called good deeds — someone is still harmed by my bad deeds even if that someone is me. As a result I must strive to get it right daily, and pray for forgiveness when it all goes wrong.

I have come to a strong realization that God does not reside in any building. He is not some mystical magic man who grants wishes to those who ask nicely. He is my Heavenly Father. I have learned that He meets us in the very place we sit, stand or collapse and He deals with us there.

I have learned the importance of not staying in a place of hurt just because you know what to expect. Knowing how the blow is thrown or when it is going to land does not take the bite out of the punch. You have to move out of its path; if you stay out of familiarity your spirit will still be damaged. Sometimes stepping outside of your comfort zone requires you step into nothing and trust God to handle what is next.

I have learned that you teach people how to treat you and they only do to you what you allow. No relationships failure is purely one sided. You have to accept your role in the failure — even if your role was that you set boundaries and demanded they be kept. Somethings are not meant to last and that is okay. Some failures are ordained.

Love is not a guarantee. Not everyone you love is going to love you back or be able to give you what you need. You cannot go backwards to fix those kinds of mistakes. You should bury the dead and not try to resurrect what you have buried. You can forgive but you cannot go back.

I have learned that forgiveness of others is the best gift you can give yourself. People you are pissed off with go on living most times unaware that you are angry. They work, live, laugh and love while the anger you carry forces you to live a life of resentment. The burden you let go when you forgive frees you to live your life unencumbered by anger.

I have learned “evil” deeds often times serve a greater purpose in God’s plan. Just think… If Judas had never betrayed Christ, there could have been no salvation through Jesus’ sacrifice. Even perceived “bad” things are in God’s plan for your life. We live in a day and age when no one ever wants anything to go wrong. We want to live the perfect day daily, but just think of all the seemingly bad events that opened a door to greater opportunity in your life. Look at how all the bad days gave you a greater appreciation for the good ones. I thank God for each tear that has fallen in 2007. I will know how to appreciate every smile in 2008.

This is what it means to be bottom heavy. Do you have a bounce back in your spirit?

I do!

 

 

 

May your new year be more fulfilled than the year past.

May your eyes behold new miracles and your heart leap with renewed joy.

May your soul be filled with laughter and your arms with those you cherish most.

Have safe and blessed New Year Everyone!

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